Blast From the Past

Sometimes things happen that catch you in a surprised state. And then there are things that happen that throw you for a loop!

I had one of those "loop" moments on yesterday. I was doing the hated task of housework on yesterday and decided it was about lunchtime and I will text my daughter and see if she's interested in going out to lunch. I turn on my cell phone and there's a text message waiting for me. I look at the I.D. number of where the message originated and have no clue as to who it's from. I started to delete and not even read it but something said, "you don't want to do that..just look, what can it hurt?" So I did. I'm glad that I did. I couldn't believe my eyes! It was from an old friend. A "someone that I used to know" if you get my meaning (ahem). An old Navy buddy that I had been stationed with prior to my relationship with my husband. So that would have been in early 1983. He was in town visiting his mother and wanted me to call him.

Let me fill you in on how we got to yesterday. Shortly after my husband passed away in July, I was sitting around with too much time on my hands (which isn't good when you're newly bereaved) and was checking my updates on facebook. I decided to try and look up some of my old Navy buddies. So I put in a few names and BINGO!. I hit the jackpot! I knew the moment I saw his profile pic that it was him. Men just don't age and "spread" like us girls do (makes ya sick for real!). So I emailed him to make sure it was him and of course, it was! He gave me his phone number and told me to call him. I thought, "wow, after all these years what do you say to someone that you used to know?" I waited a few days (didn't want to seem overly aggressive you know) and called him. We chatted about our lives. He's married and has kids and lives in upstate VA. He retired from the Navy (shock #2..marriage was shock #1 btw) and was an administrator for an ER (shock #3). He's done quite well for himself and he's quite proud of himself and he should be. I told him of my trials and losses and what I was doing these days. We ended the call with a promise to keep in touch. And we have.

Back to yesterday. He told me in that initial conversation that his mom still lived in this area and that he comes to visit regularly and would like to pay a visit to me when he's down sometimes if that was alright. I said sure as long as it's cool with your wife. He says don't worry I'll handle that (yikes!) Anyhoo, I get the text, see that it's him and have some fun with him with the banter back and forth and then I call. He wants to come by. He asked where we could meet and then he asked me where do I live? I told him and he asked if he could come by the house. I said, "you want to come to my house?" He said, "oh is that some kind of problem for you?" I said, "no, I'm a single lady and I run this joint, you're welcomed to come by if you like". So he did. I couldn't believe that he was actually sitting in my living room after 26 years! Life has been kind to him. He's put on a slight bit of weight, a small beer belly I suspect. He's no longer in the military so he doesn't have to be in tip top shape. He looks happy and things seem to be going good for him. He hangs out for about an hour and a half and then he has to go pick up his car which he's had to put a tire on. So he gives me a hug and tells me how nice it was to see me again and I walk him to his car. He says, "I'll be giving you a jingle every now and then if that's ok". "Sure", I say. We're friends, we have a past, we're adults, we should be able to handle that. Right?

Why post this here you ask? Well, if my husband were here this would have never happened first of all. I probably wouldn't have looked anyone up on facebook because I didn't have the time or the energy to do much else. I remember when I first started dating John back in 1984. I remember him saying that he saw me going in and out of the front gate with a "long, tall, dark guy". I told him yes, he & I were dating at the time that he saw that and he asked me why? I said, huh? He said, "that guy used to come through that gate several times a night with a different girl each time, why would you waste your time with someone like that?" Firstly, I didn't know that, secondly if I had known I wouldn't have wasted my time with someone like that, thirdly, we're done. He said, "good!, want to meet me for breakfast in the morning?" So he was actually trying to find out if I was seeing anyone before he asked me out and he had seen me with him not that long ago so I guess he was wondering if he & I were still a "thing". When I said we were done, he jumped. So my old friend actually precipitated my future husband and I's relationship. WEIRD!

I could hear John's voice in my head as my old "flame" sat on my couch in OUR living room. "What's he doing here? I thought you were done with him! I don't believe he's in my house. What do you think you're doing? Have you lost your mind? Just because I'm gone doesn't mean you can just talk to just anyone! Remember what he did all of those years ago and I was the one who told you about that so you could go out with me...OOOPS! I should shut up now!"

I miss him. John, the reporter.