Background Info..

I met my husband, John, in 1983 while I was stationed as a hospital corpsman at Portsmouth Naval Hospital in Portsmouth, VA. He was the security officer that covered the front entrance into the base. He worked the graveyard shift. He was a command favorite and was often referred to as the "cool" security officer.

I often spent my off-duty time at the front gate talking with him for hours. We became friends and soon enough he asked me to have breakfast with him. I agreed and he told me to meet him at the gate when he got off duty. I did and that started our relationship. He admitted to me later that he thought I wouldn't show up for that breakfast date and was "shocked" when I came walking up at 6:00am.

I knew that he was older than me but had no idea as to how much older until much later in our relationship. By then, we had delivered our first child. A daughter. That was 1986 and I found out shortly afterwards that he was 25 years older than me!

The age difference never really affected us in those early years. Our relationship was alot like any other relationship I suppose. Handling everyday life as it came.

I finished my time in the Navy and was honorably discharged from active duty. I continued to work in the medical field and he continued to work as a security officer on the graveyard shift. He had changed commands and was no longer at the Naval Hospital.

In 1989, we delivered our son and we settled in to our lives. Still not married but co habitating and happy. We bought a home in 1991 and life was great. We spent time together as often as possible between work and raising the children. John liked working on cars as a hobby and I often felt like a "2nd fiddle" to the vehicles. But it kept him home and occupied so I didn't complain too much.

Life began to give us some wrinkles around 2001. At this point we had been together for 16 years. Daughter was 15 and son was 12. John lost a childhood friend in April of 2001. They were practically raised together and it was a big blow to him. A month later my father completed suicide and that also rocked John's foundation. He, like the rest of us, couldn't understand why my Dad would do such a thing. It ate at him for quite some time. He wasn't comfortable going to my parents home after that. It was too much for him. Almost a year later, John lost his beloved mother to cancer. They were really close. John is the oldest of 12 children and was especially close to his Mom. I knew he would struggle with her death and he did. He never properly grieved her.

Shortly after her death, we decided to fulfill a promise that she had made us make years earlier. She had made us promise that we would someday get married and "make it right". So we started to plan our wedding. In November of 2002, John & I were married after 17 years of living together.